These days, it’s very common that couples, before tying the knot, live together and own everything they ever wanted. This is why asking for cash as wedding gifts is becoming popular. In fact, according to a survey conducted with wedding planners, it has become the norm.
The cash gifts average between $2,000 and $8,000, depending on the number of guests and the quality of the venue, the survey found. One planner even joked that “unless the couple specifically ask for a toaster, guests will usually ask the couple beforehand for ideas or simply just turn up with cash as their wedding gift.” Cited “Nothing could go wrong with cash.” Such funds are typically used towards the honeymoon or big purchases for the home.
However, asking for cash gifts can be tricky. If not done right, it can cause a backlash among people you asked. There are already many stories about couples being criticized by guests and labelled as “crass” after asking for cash gifts. A story that recently went viral was about a bride in Canada who asked guests to donate $1,500 each to fund her lavish wedding. The bride wrote to their guests: “I specifically asked for cash gifts. If you couldn’t contribute, you weren’t invited to our exclusive wedding. It’s a once-in-a-lifetime party.” The guests were quick to respond and lashed out at the woman for being ridiculous. (Source: huffingtonpost.ca)
Is asking for cash gifts from your guests risky? There is a silver lining, of course. As long as you handle it right and solicit your request with proper etiquette, you can almost guaranteed get it right. Below are a few tips for asking for cash gifts for your wedding:
1. Write a Kind Request
A simple wedding poem that is polite, tactful, and cute is all that’s required to graciously convey the message to your guests that you prefer cash gifts. Take this one, for example:
“If you are thinking of giving a gift,
A gift of cash would really make our day.
However, if you prefer to purchase a gift,
Feel free to surprise us in your way.”
Include this note with your invitation and rest assured that your guests are going to stick to your preference.
2. Tell the Guests What You Would Spend the Money on
When asking for cash gifts, the last thing you want is making your guests feel like they are just paying a ticket to your wedding. Explaining how you will put their cash gifts to good use is probably the best way to content them.
Cash gift registry services like Zola and Wishsprout simplify the entire process and avoid the bluntness of using a wishing well setup at the reception. Couples can use these registries to solicit cash gifts in an indirect, subtle way by sharing a list of images to represent things they want rather than going directly for cash. Guests contribute with cash to these items, and the couple will spend the money on the things they specified.
3. Say Thank You to Your Guests
Be thankful and show gratitude to your guests. Thanking your guests for their gifts will make their day whether they give you cash or another kind of gift. There are many ways to thank your guests - you can make a phone call, send an SMS, or send a thank-you card to thank them for celebrating your wedding day and for their gifts.
“Leaving a thank-you note for your guests makes perfect sense, and most online gift-registry platforms let you leave a thank-you note with the flick of your finger,” says Edison Soh, WishSprout.